Song of the WeekIsland Top 11
Picture of the WeekHot TopicsCheese Page

Revenge of the Lawn Buy Island
with Earnings from Gig

Having made 25 for playing at the High Park Tavern in Ryde on Friday, Revenge of the Lawn immediately squandered the whole fee on buying a very small island a quarter of a mile off the north east coast of the Isle of Wight.

The island emerges at very low spring tides and therefore only appears a very few times each year. They are hoping to build amusement arcades and take-aways, raised on piles, which they hope will recoup the money they spent on it.

Revenge of the Lawn's agents have taken strict precautions to keep people off their island property.

The band are very defensive and over-protective about their newly-acquired territory and tend to get very aggressive towards any living creature (no matter how small) that trespasses on their island.

Here an irate and stressed band member can be seen chasing off assorted seagulls, cormorants and crows that have dared to set webbed foot on the island, having first heaved up the "Keep Off" sign to use as a weapon. Perfectly standard legal proceedure on islands of less than 100 square metres, don't you know.

Using a Private Property sign to bludgeon a helpless porpoise, that happens to have accidentally beached itself on your island, is encouraged by most reputable law firms nowadays, as UK law has made no provision for this sort of occurence on islands of less than 100 square metres. Most solicitors will tell you it is highly recommended, if only to act as a warning to others.